So I have this friend Rob…
Who’s got an amazing way with the ladies…
And you know what’s funny?
He’s not the tallest or most athletic guy…and doesn’t really dress as well as I do.
But for some reason – women keep on approaching him.
He has one simple weapon: a great smile.
People take smiling for granted these days – especially with all the fake million-dollar grins we see on TV shows, ads or flyers.
But there’s such a thing as an attractive, genuine smile
. It lights up the room from a distance and captivates women.
Practice makes perfect…which applies to most things in life. Smiling is no exception.
Learn be more conscious about your smile – and whether you’re actually smiling around people. Are you aware of it when attending family reunions, or when you see an old friend at a restaurant? There’s a chance you’re not exactly projecting a smile even though you feel good at the moment.
Then you’ll eventually want to practice smiling when seeing strangers. They could be neighbors you see jogging past you on the street. Or the guy delivering your morning paper. Learn to get out of your comfort zone and smile a little wider while greeting them. You’ll be surprised how good it makes people feel – including yourself.
Smiling Tip #2 – Step Up Your Dental Hygiene
First, it all comes down to the rules you’ve been taught as a kid. Brush 2-3 times a day. Floss once a day. Use mouthwash.
If you tend to skip those once in a while, just don’t. You owe it to yourself (and your smile) to make cleaning your teeth a permanent habit. The biggest enemies of your mouth are plaque buildup and gingivitis…which lead to gum disease…then the demise of your pearly whites.
No one likes going to the dentist. There’s the polishing, the pressure applied to your teeth, the sound of the whole process…which amount to something that’s not worth going through all the time.
But if you want a smile that captivates women and makes you stand out…you’ve got to put in the time and money for teeth cleaning. You also want your dentist to provide sealants for the teeth (or reattach them if they’ve broken down over time). If you’re over 40, it’s better to make appointments for more often than twice a year.
Smiling Tip #3 – Consider Whitening Your Teeth
If you drink a lot of coffee or tea or wine – teeth stains are inevitable. Most of us aren’t bothered by the typical yellowish color of people’s teeth. It looks normal. But you don’t necessarily want “normal” when your smile can be fantastic.
You can have your teeth whitened by a dentist but it’ll cost you hundreds of dollars. But – here’s good news. Now you can avail of affordable teeth-whitening products like the ones offered by White With Style
I’ve used their products for 2 years – peroxide-free treatments – great whether or not you have sensitive teeth (which is the case for me)
I know this company and I’ve used their stuff for 2 years. They make DIY teeth whitening a task that’s quick, simple, and totally safe to do. Their Flavored Teeth Whitening Pens come in a wide variety of flavors: strawberry, mint, cinnamon, watermelon, and many more.
Women check themselves in the mirror every now and then…so there’s no shame on guys who do the same. But I’m not saying you must carry a small mirror in your pocket wherever you go. There’s another tool you’ve already got: your smartphone camera.
Set the camera to “selfie” mode so you can look at your own face. Show off your teeth to check for any stains or food particles left behind from your last meal.
Use Floss Picks (Carry One In Your Wallet)
Have you ever spent five minutes in the bathroom before a meeting or interview…to do one final self-inspection? I think that helps because you never know if you need to pluck away unwanted stuff from your mouth.
That’s why I love floss picks. They’re portable, user-friendly, and you can buy them in packs of 75 to 100 pieces for $2-3 at local drugstores. A floss pick (plus tissue paper) always comes in handy whenever you go out to eat.
A great smile involves more than just clean white teeth. Your lips play a part…since you won’t enjoy smiling while feeling the pain of cracked, dry lips. That’s when a good lip balm comes in to save the day.
You can buy lip balms or Chapsticks in packs. So make it a point to leave one in all practical areas: your travel bag or Dopp kit, the glove compartment of your car, your office desk, etc. Remember that smiling with chapped lips is like ordering a pizza with a crust filled with holes and creases. It might taste normal, but it’s not presentable and you wouldn’t appreciate it.
Smiling Tip #6 – Learn To Smize (Using Your Eyes)
Let’s get into the science of smiling. When kids first learn how to smile, they do it in a mechanical way. It involves contracting the zygomatic major
The result is the kind of smile that customer service reps have when you’re next in line. The smile used for IDs at school. Or the smile used by morning news anchors. It’s not natural or genuine.
What you actually want is a Duchenne smile
. This smile is named after a French neurologist who did studies on human facial muscles during the 19th century.
Duchenne had discovered a type of smile which involves both the zygomatic major and orbicularis oculi
(muscles around the eyes). A combination of eye and mouth movement. That’s what generates an attractive smile.
But a Duchenne smile isn’t as simple as it sounds. You don’t just choose to smile and then add some squint. You also need the outer parts of your eye muscles…because those will shape your eyes in a way that reflects a sincere smile. It’s like slightly squinting to “form small pillows beneath the eyes” or as Tyra Banks put it – smizing
(smiling with your eyes).
Smizing takes practice. But take note that on the occasion itself, you can try closing your eyes for a few seconds before re-opening them. This helps relax the muscles surrounding your eyes and you’ll be less likely to show a forced smile.
Smiling Tip #7 – Think Of What Makes You Smile
You’ve learned about the physical aspect of smiling. But there’s a mental side of it that shouldn’t be underestimated.
Why? Because thoughts and emotions have a major impact on the body…particularly on the eyes and the face.
That explains why people are moved when they see an athlete win a gold medal. His mouth is relaxed and curved upward, his eyes are shaped like half-moons, the face is lit up…and you can’t help but feel happy for his happiness. That’s what your smile should do (although not as moving as a winning athlete’s).
No matter who you are, there’s something you can think of that leads to a sincere smile. Your family, your friends, a funny joke that was passed around at work the other day, etc. Remember things like your college graduation, or a fun weekend at Disneyland back when you a little kid. This is about you and your happiest memories. Nobody can take those away.
Confidence is knowing who you are, what you stand for…and owning it. It helps you smile without doubts or hesitations. And as long as it’s not overdone…you can bet it’s a pretty attractive smile.
Here’s the misconception about confidence: either you have or don’t have it. Not necessarily. Some people naturally exude confidence when they need to. But that doesn’t mean the rest of us are doomed and can’t do anything about it.
You can adapt power poses to increase your confidence before an occasion. Make simple changes to the position of your arms and legs before you show up to a meeting, a party or a first date. These poses induce feel-good hormones that’ll ease you into a friendly, confident, and self-assured mindset.
We live in a time where smartphone cameras exist and selfies are popular. But that doesn’t mean you must open an Instagram to share smiling photos of yourself. All you want is to use the camera to keep track of how you smile.
Take a selfie today. Take another tomorrow. Start with your normal smile (don’t consciously change it whatsoever) and then practice going a little wider after 2-3 selfies.
Understand what angles work for you so that whenever you take group photos, you feel more confident and your smile will stand out. The goal is to smile slightly more than you think you should. (Note: be careful that you’re only showing the middle six teeth on the top row and none of the bottom row)
This one isn’t required (as not everyone has the means for it). But for those who can afford it, why not? Imagine never having to smile halfway or hide some of your teeth ever again…
You should view teeth fixing like you’re investing
in your teeth. Whether it’s having them straightened or getting dental veneers…the real motivation should be smiling as well as you can. It’s not about looking perfect or blending in with Hollywood stars.
From an objective standpoint, straight teeth make for a more attractive smile. Most people agree with that – plain and simple. So don’t feel shallow about the idea of consulting a dental specialist for your teeth.
At the end of the day, a genuine smile is attractive & contagious
. It’s a smile you can’t fake or exaggerate (although you can start with forcing a smile to loosen up the facial muscles). It’s somewhere between the messages “I’m glad to be here” and “I’m stoked to be here.” Practice enough and you’ll learn to smile that way when you encounter anyone – especially women. It’s 100% doable and definitely worth it.